Heteronormativity at its Finest!

I have a friend – a lesbian – who is divorced and has 2 children. Whenever we hang out or whenever she tells people, LGBT or straight, that she is divorced they almost invariably ask her where her ex-husband is.

Since she has been out of almost 20 years – every time it happens or I hear about it — I cringe. I am saddened and amazed in this day and age that most people assume she got married and had her children with a man.  Seriously folks – she was married to a woman and had her children with that woman.


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We really need to start changing our brain patterns to include all the myriad of possibilities that are all around us today:

  • Two men getting married and those very men having or adopting children later.
  • Two women getting married, researching a sperm donor together and having children.

These things are happening all over the place, in your neighborhood and mine.

I look forward to the day that people will ask a lesbian with children – oh did your ex-wife get co-custody?  And I hope that day is soon.